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  • From: Cathy <goosecreekfarm AT gmail.com>
  • To: homestead AT lists.ibiblio.org
  • Subject: Re: [Homestead] Give up the dream? My dilemma
  • Date: Sun, 23 Nov 2008 12:50:42 -0500

On Sun, Nov 23, 2008 at 5:19 AM, roxann <roxann AT ancientearthwisdom.com>wrote:

> > My feelings on this is that if my husband would have gotten our house
> built sooner, and built a simpler house, the comfort level >here would have
> been so much more tolerable and they would not have wanted so badly to
> leave.


I know this is a tough spot, Roxanne. I'm just a few years older than you,
and my kids were nearly the same age as yours when the center stopped
holding. For what it's worth, having the house finished may not have made
any difference. Several "back-to-the-country" couples I knew split right
after finishing their houses--apparently accomplishing the goal did not
provide the satisfaction they hoped for.

> I just can't imagine not being here. But I also can't imagine how lonely
it might be if my kids AND my husband left. Well, I can >imagine that easier
than leaving. And that's the problem.

For me, it was the other way around. I could imagine living somewhere
else--I'd done it before (it's no fun). I could not imagine living apart
from my children. Husband, yes-children, no. I guess I disagree with others
who say that 12 year olds don't benefit appreciably from having their mom
close by. Now that my youngest son is 16, I'm comfortable being a more
long-distance mom.

My situation is not identical to yours; there were other factors I had to
consider. I don't wish I'd made another choice, but this one has been
anything but easy. And I'm still alone, only not on my land. It was a very
expensive choice for me. I can't know what would have happened if I'd made
another choice--maybe it would have been better?

Alone sucks. Life in the city at a meaningless job sucks. Life alone in
the city at a meaningless job...

Will the move be soon, like next semester?

Cathy




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