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["Lynda" <lurine AT com-pair.net>]

Hmmm, I guess I'm just the odd one out.  I mean, if you look in the 
dictionary for dysfunctional family you'll find a picture of my mother, who 
I call "mommy dearest." <g>  The only "normal" childhood I had was the time 
I lived with my granparents.  What it did to me was make me fiercely 
independant and not wanting to rely on others.

I think it actually made me less fearful than is probably good for me.  I 
used to take my dogs and go walking at night through what was referred to as 
"N" town and other not so good parts of town down in Sonoma County.  I've 
always gone walking at night.  Do so here but because of the mountain lions, 
always take the dogs with me.  I'm not "afraid" of the cats, I just have a 
healthy respect for them.

I don't fear any groups of people and I think that worked in my favor when I 
worked the ex-offenders program.  At first they thought they'd take 
advantage of the little (5'2", 115#) "white" girl.  They quickly learned I 
don't scare and I don't take crap off anyone!

Although, I do wonder if some of it isn't because every time "they" tried to 
tell me something I would find that they were talking out their collective 
assets.  "They" kept telling me how evil Communists were and Grampa Harry 
was a Communist and he kept the fridge and freezer supplied with the fixings 
for rootbeer floats because that was my favorite when I was 5.  I mean, 
"evil" = rootbeer floats?  I don't think so <g>  "They" said that all "good" 
people said the Pledge and only "evil" people wouldn't.  My 3rd grade 
teacher was a JW and a very "good" person and "they" made her cry because 
she wouldn't say the Pledge.  Our teacher = "evil"?  I don't think so. 
"They" said that Sonny Barger (prez of the Hells Angels) was an evil, 
vicious person.  He owned a house that backed up to my Dad's and was the 
only neighbor who didn't holler at my little sister and I when I balls went 
over the fence.  In fact, he played ball with us.  That nice guy = evil?  I 
don't think so.

Either "they" didn't know what they were talking about or the brainwashing 
didn't take very well <g>

At anyrate, I come from a whole bunch of dysfunctional (alcoholic mother who 
was abusive) and I have very few fears.  Sorry if I messed up the theory :(

Lynda
----- Original Message ----- 
From: "EarthNSky" <erthnsky AT bellsouth.net>
> I wish I could say that.  For me, the world has been a scary place since
> I was a little kid.  I do believe that I live far away from most people
> to gain a sense of security that I don't feel living amongst others in
> society.
> Lynn, was your childhood 'normal'?  I have a theory that people who grew
> up in households where there was minimal dysfunction generally have
> fewer fears about things, whereas people like me who grew up in abusive
> households never quite process it all well, end up having scary dreams,
> and then of course that affects their waking life and adulthood.