permaculture

[Lee Flier <leeflier@comcast.net>]

 Linda,

I'm a woman (not obvious by my name, I realize) just FYI. :D

I've worked in so called male-dominated fields my whole life, so I'm 
pretty accustomed to what you're referring to as "boys' rules" of 
discourse and engage in them myself at times.  I also frequently do call 
for more civility in discussions when I think that's appropriate (and 
I'm not sure it's always men who get uncivil - I've seen some women who 
really go off the rails in Internet discussions as well).  In other 
words, I don't have a problem playing around with different styles of 
discourse in different situations.  I try to understand what the other 
person means when they write, rather than how they say it, and I 
appreciate when others show me the same courtesy.  I also no doubt 
misread people frequently, and feel that I am frequently misread.  The 
thing that is most likely to make me angry is when people are either 
being disingenuous, or obviously advocating something that I feel is 
going to harm a lot of people.  In those cases, I don't apologize for 
responding with anger.  Otherwise, I try not to and I appreciate when 
people clarify something that I misunderstood, and I try to do the same 
for them.  I also admit to losing patience sometimes when it seems 
people are more interested in dragging out the clarifications than 
getting to the point.

I know plenty of men who seem to follow this same general approach so... 
I'm not sure that so much of this is gender based... I really have no idea.

On 8/17/2010 12:51 PM, LBUZZELL@aol.com wrote:
> My concern about this conversational climate is about the people it
> excludes. For example, how many other women are regular posters on this  list?