RTP-area local music and culture

["hepstyle AT gmail.com" <hepstyle AT gmail.com>]

On Aug 6, 10:20=A0am, chapelhillshred... AT hotmail.com wrote:
> Thanks everyone for giving their opinions. =A0It is great to know that
> there are so many talented bands who can really play in this area.
> Aside from the few of you who took the comments that I made too
> personally, the question was legitimate and the wealth of information
> given is truly appreciated.

I wouldn't say anyone took the "question" too personally.  One great
thing about people around here is that they tend to know what they're
all about.  The question, as legitimate as anyone thinks it may or may
not have been was at best poorly phrased and at worst inflammatory.

> I sincerely hope that other new folks are treated a bit better in the
> future but I won't count on it. =A0It seems that there is a lot of
> emotional baggage that some of you chose to share when asked a simple
> question. =A0Since I was informed about this site, I have met a few
> people who know the history of this newsgroup and they have given me
> insight into why some of the comments here are a bit sarcastic or
> condescending.

Great!  Research is always a good thing.  Did any of that insight
include the fact that lists like this one, comprised of many people
who know each other fairly well in real life, generally bristle at
anonymous posters who come in, gunz-a-blazin' and complain about a
music community that we all love dearly?  Did they mention anything
about how historically this newsgroup welcomes anyone with an opinion
who is brave enough to share it as the people they are, not some
internet personality upon which they rely in order to be a douche?
Because you can't be a member of this community and not meet us at
some point.  If you are afraid that people will say, "Oh, you're that
jerk from the internet", then you care too much.  If I weren't a jerk
on the internet, people wouldn't know who I am at all.

Like, why do I get the feeling you don't go around the clubs here,
meet people and introduce yourself as "chapel hill shedder"?

> A word of advice... not everyone is as dumb as you might think or
> believe so why not give people the benefit of the doubt when meeting
> them for the first time... even in a virtual sense?

We're not dumb either.  Lots of us have been here for a long time, and
most of us have become comfortable with the degree to which we give
people the benefit of the doubt.  It has everything to do with how you
choose to roll in.  For instance, how can I say I've met you when you
haven't even shared your name?  That is to ask, when you chose to
remain anonymous, doesn't that say something about you?  Doesn't it
say that you would just as soon NOT let us meet or get to know you?

I'd also like to point out that everyone here was at some point new.
I just came in and started yapping.  They haven't kicked me out yet.
Shit, for like five years if you googled my name, some horrid post
from at least ten years ago would be the first result.  Some shit
about misogeny with someone named Diane.  First hit on a google search
for five years and it's some unanswerable question/complaint about
gender dynamics.  Hi mom!

>=A0Whatever happened
> to cordiality? =A0What happened to exchange of opinion without being
> condescending or mean? =A0Some of the comments posted here are truly
> rude and uncalled for. =A0If I find out that any of these rude posters
> are in bands, I'll certainly make the effort to drop in at your next
> show or two and tell the club manager what a horrible band you are...
> regardless of your 'skillz'. =A0Maybe next time you will decide to take
> a less condescending tone when someone asks a legitimate question.

Now you've just made me hope that I'm one of the rude ones, because
you can't drop into a show and not pay.  And shit, almost everyone
here that's in a band probably knows the club manager as well as if
not better than you do.  Besides, if the band is playing at all, it
means that the club manager already likes them, or at least considers
them a draw worthy of their venue, so do it!  But answer me this.
When you go to these club managers to complain about how horrible we
are, will you use your real name or will you just do it anonymously?
Also, on your way out, will you at least consider buying a T-shirt?  I
mean, it's all about supporting the community isn't it?

My name is James Hepler, and I'm in Sorry About Dresden and I Was
Totally Destroying It, among others.  I think you're kind of a
goober.  You can come complain about how horrible IWTDI are this
Saturday at the Cat's Cradle.  But it's a $25 cover.  At least stay
for the other bands because they don't even know this list exists.
But be forewarned, if you roll into the show like you rolled into this
newsgroup, you might get mean and condescending responses.