RTP-area local music and culture

[rws6 <rws6 AT duke.edu>]

perhaps i should have noted that this house is located in north durham.  but,
where the hell else would you want to live?  sheesh!


Quoting rws6 <rws6 AT duke.edu>:

> 
> 
> there is a room available immediately in the cozy home of two wxdu djs,
> known
> colloquially as FANTASY DUMP.  it is a three bedroom house with no fewer
> than
> three, additional, public rooms.  rent is $895, to be split in three.  a
> deposit
> will be due.  
> 
> while you are likely bombarded by many such offerings, we think that this 
> one
> is
> a little different, a little special.  in fact, we offer you several choice
> amenities not available to most renters in the triangle.  they are:
> 
> FIRE, SHELVES, PARTIES, DOGHOUSE, STORAGE, RED PORCH, STREET CRED
> 
> allow me to enumerate:
> 
> FIRE:  1) the main living room boasts a big ass fire place and tract
> lighting.
> this room will put you at such ease that any overheard gunfire (see STREET
> CRED)
> might as well be a salute to you and that special someone.  so get close.
> 
>        2)  the kitchen sports a GAS STOVE, so you can cook your food with
> actual
> fire.  this stove will also come in handy for cooking up your heroin or
> cooking
> down your freebase.*
> 
> SHELVES:  while many so-called apartments REQUIRE you to provide your own
> shelving, the owners and occupants of FANTASY DUMP recognize that this is an
> exceptional burden.  the available room has an entire wall of shelves that's
> just gonna totally store your stuff!
> 
> PARTIES:  everyday is party day at FANTASY DUMP!**
> 
> DOGHOUSE:  there is a huge ass doghouse in the backyard for your huge ass
> dog.
> also avaiable: a doggie-sized swiss exercise ball.
> 
> STORAGE:  between the basement, attic, and four different closets, there is
> no
> reason for you ever to use anything you own.
> 
> RED PORCH:  a red porch fronts FANTASY DUMP, and it's one of a kind.  it is
> so
> fucking red.
> 
> STREET CRED:  FANTASY DUMP is located a block away from public housing
> projects
> and a block away from the Triangle D food mart.  the block itself, in
> imitable
> durham fashion, is as quiet as a dead mouse.  but that won't stop your
> friends
> from quavering in their boots and claiming, bald-faced, that you are king
> shit
> of fuck mountain!
> 
> interested parties should reply to this email or call 286.JERX (5379)
> 
> *applications from heroin and cocaine users will not be considered.
> 
> **the having of fun not guaranteed at FANTASY DUMP parties.  past party
> themes
> have included "viva counts his shirts," and "rick! doesn't have cancer."
> -- ch-scene: the list that mirrors alt.music.chapel-hill --
> http://lists.ibiblio.org/mailman/listinfo/ch-scene
>