Market Farming

["Liz Pike" <liz AT marketfarming.com>]

NEW FROM LAUGHING BROOK FARM

Be the first, the very first to sample our newest crop!
That's right folks--the one, the only, the original

LBF Premium Mold and Mildew

Guaranteed to stick, cling and grooooooowwwwwww with very little effort.
We've worked overtime, losing sleep and hair to develop a harvesting method
guaranteed to deliver, straight to your door,  the highest quality product
available.  Moist or dried--take your pick.  All natural, non-toxic, in your
choice of 3 fabulous shades straight from the runways of
biotechnology.........

green
green
and green

Be the first in your area to own genuine Premium Mold and Mildew from
Laughing Brook Farms.  Send in your order NOW!!!

And if you're one of the first 1,000,000 customers, we'll throw in a second
baggie full, absolutely free.

Now, how much do you expect to pay for this indescribable, totally useless
product??

$59.95??

$39.95??

Beep, wrong, folks.  Tell 'em, Bob, for just how little they can be the
proud owners of LBF's Premium Mold and Mildew........

Sure, Ted, my pleasure.  Now folks, you know we wouldn't steer you wrong.
If this were not the quality product it is, backed by the Good Farmer's Seal
of Disapproval, "I" would not even be doing this emailmercial.  For just
pennies a day....you get to enjoy your genuine, totally useless, barf-o-rama
Premium Mold and Mildew straight from Laughing Brook Farms.  Now, how much
do you think the good farmers at LBF are asking for their product? Nope, not
even $29.95, nor even $19.95.

How about...........


$9.95!!!!!!!!!!

You heard me right, folks.  Can you believe that?  Just $9.95!!!  That's
just pennies a day, for a product guaranteed to last a lifetime!!!!!!!!!

Call now, before this deal gets away........1-800-SCREW-THE-RAIN.

Cash, checks, credit cards, money orders, food stamps, postal stamps,
stickers, and thumbprints readily accepted!!  Operators are standing by!!!


Disclaimer:  Possible side effects--may cause deep depression or delirious
bouts of hysteria depending on your personality type, and amount of rain
clouds building on the horizon.  Use at your own discretion.