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  • From: bobf <bobford79 AT yahoo.com>
  • To: roxann <roxann AT ancientearthwisdom.com>, homestead AT lists.ibiblio.org
  • Subject: Re: [Homestead] was british- now Bev's realization
  • Date: Wed, 4 Feb 2009 10:33:44 -0800 (PST)

To teach a child that the good guys always win; that the legal system is
just, that liars and cheats never get ahead; is to shelter them from the
truth.

What you are teaching your children is the same as my parents taught me.
But, a lot of people with whom you might interact do not abide by those
rules. And, it isn't just business. A good friend's sister dropped out of
medical school at Johns Hopkins because an important project was sabotaged.
She is an M.D., still, but not from where she wanted to graduate.

I've been cheated; as have most people that I know. Early on I developed a
reputation for not taking kindly to being cheated, but if I had abided by the
sunday school lessons I was taught, I would not have accomplished much. I
didn't make the world hard; but I have to live in it the way it is.

When I am treated with kindness, I always reciprocate in the same fashion.
But, I trust very few people when it comes to business and money. The
fastest way to lose a friend is to loan them money. When I have given
relatives or friends money; it was a 'gift', not a loan; because I did not
want it affecting our relationships.

I'm not coldhearted or miserly. I give money to transients and derelicts so
they can get a bottle or a meal; and I don't judge. But business is
business. In that area , I am serious.

I'm not arguing with you at all. I'm sure you have done well by your
children; You are smart , talented, and you have a wonderful attitude. Just
make sure they understand the "no Naivete' part. :-)

p.s. I just noticed you have a second blog; I will check it out later

---------------------------------------------------------------------


--- On Wed, 2/4/09, roxann <roxann AT ancientearthwisdom.com> wrote:

> From: roxann <roxann AT ancientearthwisdom.com>
> Subject: Re: [Homestead] was british- now Bev's realization
> To: homestead AT lists.ibiblio.org
> Date: Wednesday, February 4, 2009, 11:08 AM
> > The game really is rigged. To teach a child, today,
> about honesty
> > and good will; forgiveness and trust is to turn that
> child into an
> > easy mark. Those lessons should certainly be taught
> but with the
> > proviso that they only apply with family and the
> familie's immediate
> > circle of friends. Outside that circle they should be
> taught the way
> > the world really works.
>
> Maybe that is true if you want to play whatever game
> you've been playing, Bob. But I've always been
> trusting (to a point), I forgive and try to be kind to
> everyone. I teach my kids to be the same and would never
> teach them to be anything less. I've never been grossly
> taken advantage of in business dealings, never been stabbed
> in the back by ladder climbers, and never wished I'd
> have taken a harder approach to life. But there's a
> difference between naivete and kind - I don't want my
> kids to be naive at all. You can be trusting and yet remain
> open to the possibility that you may be wrong about
> someone's motives. Be trusting, yet alert. Know your own
> boundaries and don't blindly follow someone past them.
> Those approaches hold true whether family or not.
>
>
> Roxann, NW AR
> http://blog.ancientearthwisdom.com (Ozark Musings from the
> homestead)
> http://www.madisonwoods.wordpress.com (Fantasy Fiction
> works in progress)
>
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