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["Melody O." <melody AT crecon.com>]

While we're on the subject, I was forwarded this email by my brother this
morning:

A "First Date" Story


       We have all had bad dates, but this takes the cake. This just tells
       you how tough it is to be single nowadays. This was on the "Tonight
       Show" with Jay Leno. Jay went into the audience to find the most
       embarrassing first date that a woman ever had. The winner described
       her worst first date experience. There was absolutely no question as
       to why her tale took the prize!

       She said it was midwinter... snowing and quite cold... and the guy had
       taken her skiing in the mountains outside Salt Lake City, Utah. It was
       a day trip (no overnight). They were strangers, after all, and truly
       had never met before. The outing was fun but relatively uneventful
       until they were headed home late that afternoon. They were driving
       back down the mountain, when she gradually began to realize that she
       should not have had that extra latte.

       They were about an hour away from anywhere with a rest room and in the
       middle of nowhere! Her companion suggested she try to hold it, which
       she did for a while. Unfortunately, because of the heavy snow and slow
       going, there came a point where she told him that he had better stop
       and let her pee beside the road, or it would be the front seat of his
       car.


       They stopped and she quickly crawled out beside the car, yanked her
       pants down and started. In the deep snow she didn't have good footing,
       so she let her butt rest against the rear fender to steady herself.
       Her companion stood on the side of the car watching for traffic and
       indeed was a real gentleman and refrained from peeking. All she could
       think about was the relief she felt despite the rather embarrassing
       nature of the situation.


       Upon finishing however, she soon became aware of another sensation.
       As she bent to pull up her pants, the young lady discovered her
buttocks
       were firmly glued against the car's fender.

       Thoughts of tongues frozen to pump handles immediately came to mind as
       she attempted to disengage her flesh from the icy metal. It was
       quickly apparent that she had a brand new problem due to the extreme
       cold.


       Horrified by her plight and yet aware of the humor of the moment, she
       answered her date's concerns about "what is taking so long" with a
       reply that indeed, she was "freezing her butt off and in need of some
       assistance!"


       He came around the car as she tried to cover herself with her sweater
       and then, as she looked imploringly into his eyes, he burst out
       laughing. She too, got the giggles and when they finally managed to
       compose themselves, they assessed her dilemma. Obviously, as
       hysterical as the situation was, they also were faced with a real
       problem Both agreed it would take something hot to free her chilly
       cheeks from the grip of the icy metal!


       Thinking about what had gotten her into the predicament in the first
       place, both quickly realized that there was only one way to get her
free.
       So, as she looked the other way, her first-time date proceeded to
unzip his
       pants and pee her butt off the fender.


       As the audience screamed in laughter, she took the Tonight Show prize
       hands down... or perhaps that should be "pants down." ..And you
       thought your first date was embarrassing.



       Jay Leno's comment... "This gives a whole new meaning to being
pissed off.