permaculture

["Graham Burnett" <gb0063551@cableinet.co.uk>]

Following the thread a little while back on humour and what have you, I 
thought
this might be appropriate as permaculture humour guaranteed to offend either 
noone
or everyone....

Is the prize still open (forgotten what it was now...)?

PS. There's a more comprehensive version which spares nobody at
http://www.spunk.org/library/humour/sp001523.html


Taoism:
- Shit happens.
Confucianism:
- Confucious says, "Shit happens."
Hare Krishna:
- Shit happens, Rama Rama Ding Ding.
Hinduism:
- This shit has happened before.
Islam:
- If shit happens, Allah made it happen.
Zen:
- (What is the sound of shit happening?)
Buddhism:
- If Shit happens, it isn't really Shit.
7th Day Adventist:
- No shit on Saturdays.
- Shit happens on Saturday.
Protestanism:
- Shit won't happen if I work harder.
Lutheranism:
- Shit happens, but as long as you're sorry, it's OK.
Anglicanism:
- It's true, shit does happen -- but only to Lutherans.
Catholicism:
- Shit happens because I'm bad.
Christian Science:
- When shit happens, don't call a doctor--pray.
- Shit doesn't happen and I am not up to my eyeballs in it.
Jehovah's Witnesses:
- Knock, Knock: "Shit happens."
Mormon:
- This shit is going to happen again
Judaism:
- Why does this shit always happen to US?
Hedonism:
- There's nothing like a good shit happening.
Rastafarianism:
- If shit happens, let's smoke it!
Stoicism:
- This shit is good for you.
Calvinism:
- Shit happens because you don't work hard enough.
Secular Humanism:
- Shit evolves.
Existentialism:
- Shit doesn't happen; shit is. - What is shit, anyway?
Moonies:
- Only happy shit really happens.
New Age:
- That's not shit, it's feldspar.
- This isn't shit if I really believe it's chocolate.
Quakerism:
- There is shit in every one of us.
Atheism:
- There is no shit.
- Shit doesn't happen. Shit is dead.
Fatalism:
- Oh shit, it's going to happen!
Agnosticism:
- I'm not sure about this shit.
Voodoo:
- I'll make shit happen to you.
Scientology:
- Pay us 10,000 and we will make your shit happen.
Aum:
- We'll turn this world into shit.
Marxism:
- One day this shit will be ours.
Liberalism:
- If shit happens to the few, it'll happen to us all.

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Cheers, Anne Oldjoke