North American Fruit Explorers mailing list at ibiblio

[Lucky Pittman <Lucky.Pittman@murraystate.edu>]

In light of the recent well-meant posting, I'll offer this one....


> >>I was on my way to the post office to pick up
> >>my case of free M&M's, (sent to me because I forwarded their e-mail to 
> five other
> >>people, celebrating the fact that the year 2000 is "MM" in Roman 
> numerals), when
> >>I ran into a friend whose neighbor, a young man, was home recovering from
> >>having been served a rat in his bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken - which 
> >>is
> >>predictable, since as everyone knows, there's no actual chicken in 
> >>Kentucky
> >>Fried Chicken, which is why the government made them change their name 
> to KFC.
> >>
> >>Anyway, one day, this guy went to sleep and when he awoke, he was in 
> his bathtub,
> >>and it was full of ice and he was sore all over and when he got out of 
> the tub he
> >>realized that HIS KIDNEYS HAD BEEN STOLEN. He saw a note on his mirror 
> >>that
> >>said "Call 911!" but he was afraid to use his phone because it was 
> connected to
> >>his computer, and there was a virus on his computer that would destroy 
> his hard
> >>drive if he opened e-mail entitled "Join the Crew!" He knew it wasn't a 
> hoax
> >>because he himself was a computer programmer who was working on software 
> >>to
> >>prevent a global disaster in which all the computers get together and 
> distribute the
> >>$250.00 Neiman-Marcus cookie recipe under the leadership of Bill Gates.
> >>(It's true - I read it all last week in a mass e-mail from BILL GATES 
> HIMSELF, who
> >>was also promising me a free Disney World vacation and $5,000 if I would
> >>forward the e-mail to everyone I know.)
> >>
> >>The poor man then tried to call 911 from a pay phone to report his
> >>missing kidneys, but a voice on the line first asked him to press #90,
> >>which unwittingly gave the bandit full access to the phone line at the 
> guy's
> >>expense.
> >>Then, reaching into the coin-return slot he got jabbed with an
> >>HIV-contaminated needle around which was wrapped around a note
> >>that said, "Welcome to the world of AIDS."
> >>Luckily he was only a few blocks from the hospital - the one
> >>where that little boy who is dying of cancer is, the one whose last wish 
> >>is
> >>for everyone in the world to send him an e-mail and the American Cancer 
> Society
> >>has agreed to pay him a nickel for every e-mail he receives.  I sent him
> >>two e-mails and one of them was a bunch of x's and o's in the shape of 
> an angel
> >>(if you get it and forward it to more than 10 people, you will have 
> good luck but
> >>for 10 people you will only have OK luck and if you send it to fewer 
> than 10
> >>people you will have BAD LUCK FOR SEVEN YEARS).
> >>
> >>So, anyway, the poor guy tried to drive himself to the hospital, but on 
> the way he
> >>noticed another car driving without its lights on. To be helpful, he 
> flashed his
> >>lights at him and was promptly shot as part of a gang initiation.
> >>
> >>************************************************************************ 
> *************
> >>
> >>Send THIS to all the friends who send you their junk e-mail and you 
> will receive 4 green M&Ms, but if you don't, the owner of Proctor and 
> Gamble will report you to his
> >>Satanist friends and you will have more bad luck: you will get cancer 
> from the
> >>Sodium Laureth Sulfate in your shampoo, your wife will develop breast 
> cancer
> >>from using the antiperspirant which clogs the pores under her arms, and 
> >>the
> >>government will put a tax on your e-mails forever.
> >>
> >>I know this is all true, 'cause I read it on the Internet.

Lucky



------------------------------------------------------------------------
Click here for savings: beMANY!
http://click.egroups.com/1/4115/0/_/423498/_/962026623/
------------------------------------------------------------------------