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  • From: "Shelley Pasco" <whistle AT halcyon.com>
  • To: market farming <market-farming AT franklin.oit.unc.edu>
  • Subject: Re: women and small market gardens-chatty
  • Date: Tue, 22 Feb 2000 21:59:17 -0800


I've always been overly independent and I started my farm on my own, on 1/2
acre and with a full time job. My landlord did the tractor work for
me--plowing, tilling at the beginning of the season. The second year I was
fired, so I had a lot more time to spend getting the farm started and I
increased to 1 acre of raised beds. The third year I met my current partner,
but I wanted to keep my independence, so I wouldn't let him help me much on
my now 4 acre farm. He had his own farm, and I insisted that he keep his
farm thing separate. I was recently divorced, and he was recently
widowed--he ended up spending most of his time with me, and by the end of
the year, we were both doing my farm work. Like Alison, I married a sweet
man who was raised in the city, and while he liked the idea of having a
farm, he was not at all into the idea of doing ANY farm work. It was all my
thing, and he started to place limits on it. I didn't like that.

The fourth year (last year), I let some of my independence go, and let Mike
help a lot more. We were more like partners, but I wasn't quite ready to let
it go. He brought a lot of equipment to the partnership, and a lot of
growing experience that I don't have. We had a relationship crisis at the
beginning of the season, because I was realizing that he needed a lot of,
shall we say, "encouragement". I wasn't sure I was ready for that. He's a
really hard worker once he gets going, and he works efficiently, but I was
feeling like a nagging mother, and it didn't appeal to me. So up through
September I kept this distance between us that was very stressful. As if we
needed more stress! In retrospect, I suppose I was waiting for him to prove
himself to me--not entirely fair on my part.

The good news is that I got my wits about me then, and we sat down for a
meeting. I stayed in control of myself and didn't get personal or
oversensitive, and we came up with job titles for ourselves that I hoped
would clarify our roles and would make sure that (almost) everything got
done on time and properly. So, now he's Equipment Manager, Plant Manager
(planting, cultivating, irrigating), and Harvest Manager and I'm Business
Manager, Greenhouse Manager, and Scheduler. We're farming 18 acres this
year, and it's tremendously scary right now--our funds are tight and we're
constantly consoling ourselves that we WILL get everything done this summer.
But, we're both happy and feel like the work is divided fairly, and we
are content in our roles in our personal AND business relationship. 95% of
the days
we're working together we get along and have fun, and we can still sleep in
the same room at night. I think that's pretty remarkable for this day and
age. (Yes, I could do heavy stuff myself, but I don't like it much, and he
actually likes it! Similarly, Mike could handle customer service stuff, but
I actually enjoy it and he hates it.)

We don't have kids now, but I really admire those out there that have
managed to do so much farmwork and raise good kids at the same time. I will
look to you in the near future as we get closer to building our own family.
I have to agree with Lee that this is the most incredibly satisfying, and
exhausting business I've ever been in, and I too have had other businesses
of my own. I completely love everything about it.

Shelley
Whistling Train Farm
Kent, WA



  • Re: women and small market gardens-chatty, Shelley Pasco, 02/23/2000

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