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  • From: "David R. Matusiak" <dave AT matusiak.org>
  • To: internetworkers AT lists.ibiblio.org
  • Subject: [internetworkers] ...speaking of global doom
  • Date: Thu, 30 Jan 2003 21:53:56 -0500

anyone catch that "State of What Dubya's Speech Writers are Thinking" thing the other night?

i've gotta say, it was pretty well written -- and he only flubbed a few minor lines. those diction lessons are paying off in spades. anyway, i think there were some neat and fantastical accounting practices going on in the midst of all that killing Iraqi people stuff.

$200,000,000,000 -- amount needed to fully destroy, rebuild and manage Iraq
for 3 years (re-double this amount every 3 years)
+
$ 15,000,000,000 -- amount needed to cure AIDS in Africa so America looks
like a "Big Sweetie"
+
$ 1,200,000,000 -- smokescreen appeasement "hydrogen car" program to get the
noisy anti-car lobby to STFU
+
$ 450,000,000 -- to teach kids to read while *still* not raising teacher
salaries or getting parents to take responsibility
+
$ 600,000,000 -- to continue to single-out druggies for "special government
programs" (weak cover for giving $$ to faith-based groups)
+
$ 6,000,000,000 -- for bioterrorism countermeasures (instead of finding out
"why" someone would want to "bioterror" the US)
+
$ 16,000,000,000 -- in secret funding for suped-up cyber-spying initiatives to
be used against its own citizens
----------------
$239,250,000,000 -- that is almost 240 BILLION DOLLARS we will have to come up
with in order to prove that we are the only superpower.

and, just out of curiosity, what was our national deficit *before* this?? i don't really know, but if i had to guess, i'd say somewhere around:

$6,406,007,777,245.04

THAT is 6.4 TRILLION DOLLARS.

SO, 6.4 trillion plus 240 billion -- jeez, i can't really count that high.

anyway, the GOOD NEWS is that Americans no longer have to be weighted down with such HIGH TAXES!! that's right!! with the new Republican-controlled Congress and One World Government, US Citizens will now get an (almost) FREE RIDE!!

Suppose you paid $1,450.00 in taxes last year; this year, you will only have to pay $45.00!!! HOW IS THAT FOR A TAX PLAN?!?!?!?

and if you are already SUPER-RICH, you won't have to pay ANY TAXES on ANYTHING!! you can buy extra homes, priceless jewels, dozens of SUVs -- ALL TAX FREE!! and don't you know that BUYING THINGS helps the US economy??

maybe if we are lucky, they will outsource all this accounting to Pakistan, 'cause they seem so goddamn stable with their NUKES and all. i'm sure there are some good consulting firms in Syria that could help us find ways to protect our US Citizens and Borders. Shoot! with the way Slick Dick Cheney and co. charter deals, those Al-Queda "baddies" of today could be our technical infrastructure "buddies" of tomorrow!!

Just IMAGINE the outsourcing possibilities!!
sleep tight!
/drm

bibliography:

http://www.whitehouse.gov/news/releases/2003/01/20030128-14.html
http://www.brillig.com/debt_clock/





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