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Hell on wheels
Ed Foster
MICROSOFT RECENTLY
announced a deal with BMW to use Windows CE in the navigation systems of
its cars. That much is reality, but what follows is my vision of a future
scenario we might expect should current licensing trends continue. If you
have been paying attention, though, you'll realize such a future might not
be all that distant.
FBI: Interrogation of Ms. Lisa Jones is
commencing at 3:23 pm. I am Agent Frank Murphy of the Federal Bureau of
Investigation's copyright squad. With us in the room is Mr. Ellis Preston,
counsel representing ABC Motors Corporation. Ms. Jones, do you acknowledge
that you have been informed of your rights to have an attorney present if
you wish, and that you have agreed to Mr. Preston's participation in this
interview?
Jones: Yes ... yes, there's just been some
mistake. I didn't do anything ... I just want to clear this
up.
Preston: Thank you, Ms. Jones, so do we. Could you just
describe for us the incident you had this morning involving your ABC
Motors vehicle?
Jones: You mean when I couldn't get the car
started again? I've been having so much trouble with that "electronic key"
ignition system lately, I've been late to work every day this week. I was
really anxious to be on time today, so I called your emergency service
line. When they couldn't help me get the electronic key working, I asked
them how to disconnect it so I could just start the car with the regular
key.
Preston: So you specifically asked them to help you
disconnect the electronic system. Ms. Jones, don't you understand that's a
violation of federal law? The Digital Millennium Copyright Act makes it a
crime to tamper with digital rights management technology. In asking our
service representatives to help you do that, you were asking them to be
your accomplices in infringing Microsoft's intellectual property
rights.
Jones: Copyright Act? Microsoft? What does any of
that have to do with me trying to start my car?
Preston:
When you purchased your ABC Motors vehicle, the dashboard display
presented a notice that your use of the electronic systems was governed by
an end user license agreement with Microsoft Corporation. You were given
the opportunity to read that license agreement right on the dashboard
display before agreeing to accept it. Did you read that agreement before
you started the car?
Jones: I tried to, but the print was so
small I had to bend over and peer through the steering wheel. And it was
taking so long to scroll through it, I think I just gave up and pushed the
"I accept" button. The salesman said I had to do that or I couldn't start
my car.
Preston: Yes, well, if you had read the license
agreement when you had the chance, you would have seen that Microsoft
places certain restrictions on the use of its software that we at ABC
Motors, as a Microsoft OEM, are obligated to help enforce.
In order
to protect its intellectual property from possible illegal transfer,
Microsoft forbids you to disconnect any part of the electronic system.
Furthermore, Microsoft reserves the right to have us install updates to
their software and their digital rights management capabilities when you
bring your car in for service.
Jones: When my car is
serviced? Is that why I started having all this trouble starting my car
right after my last oil change? You must have put some new software in my
car without telling me, and it's got some kind of bug. They can't do that,
can they?
FBI: They can if it's part of your contractual
relationship with Microsoft, Miss.
Preston: I'm not at
liberty to say if there was a "bug" as you call it, Ms. Jones. I do want
to point out to you, however, that neither Microsoft nor ABC Motors bears
any responsibility for fixing any such defects with your vehicle. Again,
if you had read your license agreement, you would know
this.
Jones: Wait a minute. I don't know about Microsoft,
but there is no way ABC can say they aren't responsible for any defects in
my car. I have a 50,000-mile warranty.
Preston: Indeed you
do. But in order to protect its rights under copyright law, Microsoft
includes essential system components -- such as the drive train, brakes,
tires -- as part of its license agreement with you. Under Virginia law,
which just so happens to be the law Microsoft chose to govern your
agreement, you and Microsoft can opt to include whatever parts you choose
as part of this transaction. But I believe that under your warranty, ABC
is still responsible for any defects in the workmanship of the floor
mats.
Jones: I can't believe this. Why wasn't I told any of
this before I bought my car? Why couldn't I have been given a readable
copy of this "license" when I was signing all those papers in the
dealership?
Preston: It's called freedom of contract, Ms.
Jones, and it's one of your most important rights. You and Microsoft can
choose to enter into this contractual relationship in whichever way is
most mutually beneficial and convenient.
Jones: This is
insane. I don't care how big it is, Microsoft can't treat American
consumers in such a shoddy manner. Just wait until I call the newspapers
and tell them about all this.
Preston: Oh, dear. You really
shouldn't have said the word "shoddy," Miss Jones. Agent
Murphy?
FBI: Lisa Jones, I'm placing you under arrest for
criminal violations of the Digital Millennium Copyright
Act.
Jones: Why? What did I do?
Preston: You
just violated the most critical terms of your license agreement right in
front of us, I'm afraid: You disparaged
Microsoft.
Disparage whomever you wish in your
letters to Ed Foster, InfoWorld's reader advocate. Contact him at
gripe AT infoworld.com. |
