I saw a couple of very large bees this summer myself. I went looking and identified
them as "carpenter bees". I can certainly say they were docile and the
biggest bees I've ever seen.
I'd bet you have Yellow Jackets; they do exactly as you described.
As for a swarm and queen that might have taken a side trip on the way to their new home, no chance. If the bees leave their hive in a swarm taking their queen with them, they are focused on nothing else but getting that queen into her new home.
So, who knows what bees they might have been, but honey bees love those split grapes, and apple cider! I'd guess the bulk of your friends were honey bees. And for what it is worth, in my limited experience, they get up late and work into the evening.
First, I highly doubt the man who was killed by stings was a victim of honey bees. They are very gentle and do not go out looking for a fight.
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