Bev,
Though I'm a lapsed Master Gardener, I've never grown asparagus from seed, so this is just from reading. Take it with a grain of salt!!!
Supposedly, asparagus can be transplanted to its permanent bed when it is at least 6 inches tall. Here's what I found on an Extension site, which may be of some help:
http://www.ces.ncsu.edu/depts/hort/hil/hil-2-a.html
If you have them growing extremely close together in a flat now, you may want to thin them, or else attempt a transplant of the thinned ones now (accepting some losses in an effort to save them rather than intentionally kill them with thinning).
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