This is one typo that cannot be overlooked. The acronym is IOKIYAR for It's
OK If You're A Republican. The first letter is an I, as in It's, not an L,
as in Lapsed.
The Zanoni Ziggernauts report that his trouble with the keyboard derives
from the fact that his fingers and toes have fused together, having become
finlike. This hyper-evolutionary adjustment allows him to swim through the
open settling tanks of vile poteen at CRAPPCO. For you newbies, that is the
Catawba Recycling And Poteen Production Company. See, the waste material
from Roanoke hospitals, vet clinics and stockyards is transported directly
to CRAPPCO where it is recycled into the production line of his esteemed
beverage. The Ziggernauts have discovered that the chemicals from the
hospital waste have triggered this reverse evolution, sending him back in
time. Soon, scales will begin to replace skin.